Skip to main content

Welcoming

Welcome back, welcome home, welcome in, you're welcome! Welcome, welcome, welcome.  Every September I put these words all over my classroom- on the door, in the halls, on their desks.  It has a ring to it: Welcome back.  Jay is home from college for fall break and of course we all say Welcome Home.  It has such meaning now that he is living somewhere else most of the year.  It's not something we say to just anyone, it is reserved for special people coming back to a special place.
I recently opened a meditation entitled, "Welcome".  I wasn't sure what to expect, but what happened was definitely not something I expected.  I just thought it was some ordinary talk about getting back to what you loved maybe, or going back to a place like home.  Not at all.  The speaker invited you to think of the last time someone made you feel welcome, with a hug, or a greeting, or an offer of a cup of tea.  She said to think of the last time someone gave you that big warm welcoming hug that made you feel loved.  Well, I have to be honest, it brought me to tears.  I suddenly had these images of my grandmother, who I hadn't thought of in a while, but who never failed to make me feel welcome.  Even in her last days when her body couldn't move too freely she would swing her arms wide and gather you up for a great, warm, loving hug.  I missed her so much right then, her open happy smile, her bright, shining eyes, and her love.  And it made me cry - that is a welcome I miss.
These days when I try to hug my kids, I'm usually greeted with a stiff arm swipe across the back or maybe a quick pat.  They hold their necks as if to say, "Don't you dare try to kiss my cheek!"  It's not very welcome.  And it urges me to give up.  But you know what, I won't.  I want my kids to feel welcome every time they see me.  You never know when they may really be needing that hug, and I'm not going to hold back.  Maybe someday they'll be missing me and the hugs I give now will remind them of just how much they are loved.  So they are just going to have to deal with it.
I think of others too - the people I work with or friends I don't see much.  How often do they feel welcome?  The other day I ran into an old friend and our hands were both full at the time and we didn't hug, but I think he knew from my smile that I was happy to see him and that I was welcoming him back.  Sometimes there are reasons for us to hold back from hugging and truly welcoming another, but there shouldn't be many.  Pass on the love!  Welcome someone home.  Welcome someone back.  You may never know how much they need to feel welcomed.  Find someone who makes you feel welcome too.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

What Is Grief?

 What is grief? It is standing in the shower and  you are suddenly crying and then you are sobbing. And you barely thought about it in the two days since you heard  your Uncle Rich passed. You thought about your dad and your cousins and your aunt and how sad they must be and you checked in on your dad. "I'm so so sorry." And you went to work and you did what you had to do. And now you are ready for another day and you are thinking of all the things and then you are crying and you are little again and vulnerable  and your heart hurts. And you remember everyone. Medford Lakes and a swimming pool and laughing so hard  and dancing around a Christmas tree and fireworks by the lake at night. And you can see his face and all their faces smiling Aunts and uncles and cousins and brothers who aren't here. And you remember his voice, deep and laughing, and you remember his kindness and his advice. "Are you taking vitamin C, Joannie?" You see all their faces and you mis
6 comments
Read more

Home for Christmas

  Dear College Kid and Post-Grads,  Welcome Home! You are finally here! And we are so happy to welcome you. It's been a long semester. You've faced trials and tribulations. You still need to meet your own benchmarks and others you've exceeded. But it's over now. For now, you must rest. For now, you are released from your duties and obligations for studying and group projects. You don't have to worry about homework and practice and when to wake up and when to eat. You are home. You can sleep until noon. We are here to love you back to health and wellness and give you that unmistakable feeling of home.  Some things haven't changed here at home. There will be bacon and eggs for breakfast and we will get cream donuts from McMillan's tomorrow. We will have bagels and cream cheese one morning. Some things are new to us. We will order the meat lover's pizza. We will make room on the shelf for your protein powder. Some things have changed. We painted the front d
Post a Comment
Read more

Tomorrow We Will Make Coffee

We are all searching for guarantees.  The guarantee on shipping from our website order, the guarantee on the newly-purchased mattress, the guarantee that when we wake up the electricity will still be on, the guarantee that the weather will get nicer soon, the guarantee that my car will still be parked where I left when I get back, the guarantee of a healthy pregnancy, the guarantee of an easy child.  All the things we expect at the beginning of the day to go our way, the meeting, the conference call, the sales pitch, the ruling, the game, the score.  I see people searching for schools, looking for a guarantee that the choices they make, the selection of this school over that school, will guarantee that their child will thrive, be successful, and maybe happy.  They want the guarantee.  They expect it when they walk in, as if they were going to a car wash, that the car will be perfectly cleaned when it comes out the other end.  As if kicking the tires will guarantee the purchase they mak
7 comments
Read more